dictators

i can’t be myself today writing
lightly so as not to disturb the page
animals are stirring, space heater is
humming, the phone won’t ring yet
even if it did my words would sound
foreign to me i keep trying to find
a reason to get out of bed but the
dictators argue in my head
my body paralyzes the moment my
foot hits the floor
i can see death and smell fear
in every breath taken
trying to ignore castro chastising
mussolini and stalin telling me to
have another drink “you stop
and think! where are the sacred colors
and freak flag flyers?”
hidden deep in the crevices of
a dominated mind and begging
to just be left behind

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